Support

As I get ready to head to bed on the first day of the week of Christmas , I really need to put put into the universe how incredible Travis is.

Being my friend and my roommate isn’t always a bed of roses. And we’ve had our ups and downs.

But he has been shoved into this black hole along with me and has had to figure out how to make space for the diagnosis, his own feelings about things, and trying to navigate caring for me, all while having his own life and work and relationships to manage.

Whether it was comforting me as I cried the day I came home from my first ultrasound when the tech told me it looked like inflammatory cancer, or hanging out with me pre-surgery in a hospital he never wants to go back to, or something as simple as tilting our shower head down because I no longer can…. He’s gonna deserve sainthood by the time this is all over.

One of the major differences of cancer as an adult vs as a kid is that you have to be much more cognizant of how you’re affecting the people around you. And I won’t always get it right. And he probably won’t either.

I’m going to make him preemptively shave my head on 1/2 – if I gotta lose my hair, I want to control it. And I will probably cry the whole time – not because I give two poops about my hair, but because it’s starting this process again.

I can’t think of anyone else I would want to do it.

There will never be enough words, or tokens, or grand gestures to express my appreciation. And we haven’t even hit the hard part yet.

When you send the good thoughts up for me, send some for him too. There will be times he will need them more than me 😉

I love him as much as any person has ever loved their best friend, and I cannot imagine trying to do this without him.