Out of head, onto screen

My chest itched today, at the scar line from my mastectomy. When my fingertips brushed the scar, I started to cry. When I saw or touched my old scars… the leukemia scars… I felt like a badass. I beat that shit and fuck that scar. So when this one made me cry, I had to

No.

It’s been a rough week and a half. I’ve fallen twice and had to call 911. The first time was at home. I was trying to flip up my cane that had fallen, and I got tripped up trying to step over it. Scraped up my arm on the way down. Goose egg on my

Tough times.

TLDR; my body hates me. Short version: my body freaked out when I got cancer and started attacking itself. Progressively, and now aggressively, worse. I can barely walk, stand, or move my arms. Had to call 911 twice so far for lift assistance, today because I fell trying to get out of the car and

Too much.

I am overwhelmed and feeling my stress levels skyrocket. If you can spare some good thoughts…..

Eleven days

Eleven days from surgery. The bowling ball is getting painful, but there’s nothing to be done. It’s tugging on the wound site, hurts throughout, and is causing back pain. The 26th can’t come soon enough. The side effects have also started from the hormone therapy. Joint pain is the primary – my fingers, feet, and

No news…

No updates because there’s nothing to update on! My boob feels like a giant water balloon that keeps getting bigger. My energy levels are still crap. And surgery is still scheduled for 4/26. /end 🙂

Resting and recreating

I’ve spent the last couple of weeks since getting out of the hospital taking it easy and recuperating. I’m feeling a little lazy and a little stir crazy, quite honestly, but alas. My surgery is scheduled for Tuesday, April 26th. I’ll be undergoing a modified radical mastectomy, removing the left breast and a hunk of

The plan.

The plan is solidifying. Chemo is on hold. My oncologist hasn’t decided if it’s done or just done for now. That will likely depend in part on what comes out of surgery. Surgery will be removal of the left breast. My surgeon doesn’t want to remove both right now to avoid any unnecessary complications. So

Update time

I haven’t updated in a while mostly because I just haven’t felt up to it physically or emotionally. I did land in the hospital for a couple of days again. This time it was mostly uncontrolled nausea and my counts were super super low. I ended up getting to transfusions while I was in but

I’m tired and I don’t wanna blog. The last few weeks have been a little brutal. I’ve been dealing with chemo and all the side effects, spent a couple days in the hospital and I’ve just been recovering ever since. It’s entirely possible that today was my last round of chemo. None of my doctors